Bob and Weave

Musings of an impostor. Welcome to the masquerade.


Posted by flyingbk on 10/14/2009

(first, an administrative note: you no longer need to submit your email address in order to comment. i hope to see more comments and discussion!)

A couple days ago, I spent time with my mom and stepdad. We were talking about my need for a wife, and my mom said something to me that completely blind-sided me because she had never said anything along those lines before. She said, “Bob, you know I always tell you how handsome you are. But let’s face it, you’re kinda short and fat, and lots of girls are not attracted to you.” Whoa! Now, I wasn’t offended at all. And she is right; I had previously arrived at the painful conclusion that when girls picture the man of their dreams, they don’t envision a Korean dude who is 5’6″,  mildly athletic at best, and doesn’t like shaving his facial hair.

You see, all my life, while growing up, my mom always told me how handsome I was. She said it everyday and multiple times a day, and usually with unbridled enthusiasm and appreciation. So as I entered puberty and junior high, I would be shocked when my counterparts of the opposite gender did not agree with my mom’s infallible judgment. It took me quite a while to realize that she was just doing her motherly duty, and/or she was operating out of her maternal bias. Unfortunately, she had no influence whatsoever on the greater female population-at-large.

But, I am eternally thankful. I am thankful for her constant affirmation of me, and I have no doubt that her flurry of complimentary words have aided in shaping me as a man who has healthy self-esteem (then again, maybe she is the reason that I can be vain and enjoy looking at myself in the mirror..). Reflecting on my mom’s affirmation reminds me how powerful positive words can be in someone’s life.

We all desperately seek affirmation. After all, Jesus received affirmation before he began a ministry that would turn the world upside-down. The baptism of Jesus is one of my favorite Gospel passages, and I’m always reminding my youth group kids about its effects. Matthew 3:16-17 states:

As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and lighting on him. And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.”

I love saying the Father’s words to Jesus over me, and over others. Following that episode is Jesus’ 40-day fast and the 3 temptations of Satan. Surely, the affirmation of the Father armed Jesus with much needed protection against the silver tongue of the devil.

Likewise, we all need to be affirmed. Hopefully, God can use me (and you!) to affirm many, just as I was affirmed over and over whenever my mom greeted me as I returned home from grade school.


One Response to “affirmation”

  1. dan said

    i enjoy looking at you.

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